My Very Messed Up and Complicated Life
by Ayra13
Summary: Fanfic containing characters from multiple stories. Warning: Will have Lemony scenes! If you don't like multiple partners, find something else to read.
1. Chapter 1

This is my first fanfic, and it's a crossover, plus there's a character I made up as the main character, so please don't kill me if it's not great. I also don't have a beta reader, so I can't promise no mistakes, but I'll definitely do my best.

Also, I own none of the Percy Jackson characters, or anything else related to the Percy Jackson series. Otherwise, this would be an actual book. And not a fanfic.

Chapter 1

Hi guys. I'm Zalinka Evensberg. Apparently, word got out that I have a super interesting story to tell. I dunno if that's true or not, but I'll let you decide. Everyone's been begging to hear the story, first hand. So here goes nothing, I guess.

I'd been having one helluva week. I mean, you'd think that when your mom dies in a freak accident, leaving you an orphan, on your seventeenth birthday, that's the worst that could happen, right? Wrong. Apparently, my mom didn't own our house. She'd been paying rent on it for years. So of course, she goes and DIES and doesn't ever tell me this. Well, the landlord comes by one day, knocks on the door, and barges in the second I open the door. "Hello, Miss Evensberg. Might I speak to your mother?" (Of course no one's bothered to tell him she died last week...)  
"Sorry, sir, but she died just last week in a freak accident. Is there anything I can do to help you?"  
"Huh. Sorry to hear about your mom." He didn't sound sorry at all. "But anyways, the rent on this house is over three months late, and I came to collect or evict whoever happens to be living in here."  
"Wait, what? We own this house. Mom paid off the mortgage years ago. She always made sure to pay extra just to get the mortgage out of the way. No way do we... I owe rent."  
"Sorry, hun. Your mom was lying to you. She paid rent on this house every month. So now it's three months late, and I want to see some money. No money, and you get evicted. That's just the way it is. So, fifteen hundred, or you're out."  
I sighed. I knew there was no money in the bank. Or at least not enough to pay off that debt. "Fine. At least give me time to pack, please?"  
"Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Just be outta here by noon tomorrow." He turned on his heel and left.  
I stood there for a while, wondering just what I would do. I was seventeen, an orphan, homeless, friendless, and virtually penniless. I'd never gone to school. Mom said it was too dangerous, but never explained why. She'd always had to work, so I wasn't even homeschooled. My dad left us before I was born. I learned basic math, reading, and writing on my own. I'd really never left the house, except to go to the library next door, where I'd spend the day devouring books.

I had my bags packed by evening. I didn't have that much stuff. A few books I'd been given from the librarians, who knew how much I loved to read and that I couldn't even afford a book. My clothes, just a bunch of too-big T-shirts and some jeans from Goodwill. A hairbrush, toothbrush, toothpaste, and some mascara, the only amenities my mom had been able to afford. I packed the blankets from my mom's old bed, scoured the kitchen for food that would last, and wrapped it all up inside my single bag. I slept one last night in my old bed.

I left that house by ten in the morning. I had no idea where to go, so I just went to the library, stuffed my bag behind a bookshelf, and snuggled into a nearby beanbag to read a few books. I figured that I would sleep in the library that night, if I could find a way to get around the librarians.

I was in the middle of reading one of my personal favorites, _Percy Jackson and the Olympians: the Lightning Thief_, when a young man, maybe nineteen, sat down next to me. He was maybe 5' 6" - shorter than me. His eyes were a brownish caramel color, just like his thick wavy hair. He wore an Avalanche cap, a T-shirt emblazoned with the words "Go Green" across the front, camo cargo pants, and a pair of scuffed and muddy Jordans. "Do you like the Greek myths?" His voice quiet and deep.  
"Yeah, I love the stories. And the idea of half-bloods? I wish I could have a life like that... Even with all the monsters trying to kill you." I laughed, knowing how outrageous that sounded.  
He looked at me, obviously trying to see if I was for real. "What if... What if that world were real?" He started slowly. "What if you and I were a part of that world?"  
I stared at him. He was serious. "Then I would beg you on my knees to take me to Camp Half-Blood, put me in Hermes' Cabin, and wait until my parent that... I've... never... met... HOLY FREAKING COW! IS THAT WHY I CAN'T READ WELL?" Yeah, I forgot to mention that I'm dyslexic... Mom says - said that I am ADHD too. "Hold up then. Why have I never been attacked by monsters?"  
He lifted an eyebrow. "Do remember we are in a library. Unless you want to get kicked out, keep your voice down. Also, did I mention I'm a satyr? And that I've been keeping you safe for the last seventeen years?"  
"Um, no, you managed to leave that bit out. So... I'm gonna take a wild guess here: do you know how my mom died?"  
He looked sheepish. "Yeah... I tried to save her, I promise, I did! But it's hard to keep someone safe when you're being chased by a Chimera and you are the only one to fight it off."  
"Hey, it's alright. At least now I know how she really died. I didn't think a car accident would leave marks like that." He seemed shocked. I guess he didn't expect me to take it that well. But as I said, my week had started out pretty poorly. "Oh, by the way, I'm Zalinka Evensberg, though you probably already know that. What's your name?"  
He chuckled. "Well, this has got to be the most interesting pickup I've ever done. I tell you I'm a mythological creature that's not supposed to exist, tell you I was there when your mother was killed, and that she was killed by another mythological creature that's also not supposed to exist, and you seem ecstatic to learn I'm real, the Greek myths are real, you are a half-blood. And now you ask my name as though we are talking about the whether over lunch in a cafe? Damn, girl. You're good. Anyways, I'm Brett."  
"Cool name. And yeah, any other week, I might have acted a bit differently to all the new info. But when your mom dies on your birthday and you get evicted the next day? Yeah, I might just be in shock." Then I thought of something. "Hold up a sec, if you are real, and the Greek myths are real, is _this_ real?" I held up the Percy Jackson book I'd been reading.  
"Well, yeah. No idea how it ended up published, but yes, it is all true - except the romance between Percy and Annabeth. They're just friends."  
"SWEET! Um, does Percy have a girlfriend? And is he at camp right now?" I asked, silently begging that he'd be single and at camp.  
"No, and yes, in that order. I'm sur-"  
"Can we go to camp RIGHT NOW? Because I am dying to get in there." I said.

Suddenly, I noticed one of the librarians peering at us through a bookshelf. It was the one librarian here who hated me, with a passion. Just now though, her eyes seemed to glow red. "Uh, Brett, I'm starting to think there's a monster after us. Don't think I'm trying to be all hero-y and all, but her eyes are glowing. And red. And she's the one that despises me."  
He swung around. "I knew this place smelled off. Here, take this." He handed me an intricate silver bracelet with a gold disc in the center. "Press the disc and it will transform into a whip made of celestial bronze." He pressed his index finger to a golden arm band, which sprang into a wicked looking sword, apparently based on a scimitar, but with several sharp points along the outside edge and the end of the blade thinned into a curved point clearly meant to cause as much damage as possible in a single blow.  
"I know this is bad timing, but should I grab my stuff or just leave it here?"  
He glared at me. "Leave it. We'll give you some money so you can go buy clothes and anything else you need. Let's get outta here." I'd love to say we did something awesomely cool, like attack the monster peering at us through the books. But no, Brett just had to punch through the window behind us and pull us both through. My first time consciously seeing a monster, and we don't fight it? Come on. Anyways, we ran flat out for the bus that had just stopped at the corner. We barely made it before the doors closed. I looked back as the bus pulled away. Maybe I shouldn't have done that, but who cares? Glaring out of the broken window was one of the monsters that had chased Percy: a Fury.  
"Crap. A Fury? Gods, your mother must have done something to keep the monsters at bay. You must be incredibly alluring to them. i wonder who your dad is?"  
I silently prayed that whoever it was wasn't Poseidon, 'cause even though I'd only read about him, I had a massive crush on Percy Jackson. And it would be way more than incredibly messed up to like your half-brother. Although, I suppose any half-blood I might like was a cousin of mine somehow... ugh. I hoped the gods wouldn't see that as incest, 'cause there was no way in hell... Tartarus, I guess, that I would give up at least one half-blood boyfriend.


	2. Chapter 2

**School's almost out, so I'll be posting more often I hope. This one's a bit of a cliffie, so don't hang me. Also, if you have any plot suggestions, especially something for right after this chapter, let me know. Otherwise, things will be going rather quickly. I'm no good at drawing out the beginning of relationships.**

Well, we made it to Camp Half-blood in one piece. But I nearly had a heart attack once we got there. Cause guess what? Brett hadn't told the entire truth when he said the Percy Jackson stories were true. Because a certain castle that looked an awful lot like Hogwarts loomed in the distance. Apparently, Camp Half-blood was significantly bigger than in the Percy Jackson books. "Hey, Brett, um, what is that castle? I've never heard of it in the books. Though it looks like Hogwarts from the Harry Potter books."

Brett gave me a sidelong glance. "Seems the story got broken up a bit. Both of those stories are most of the way true, except the Harry Potter ones are a bit farther off. Good thing too, or we'd have one more evil maniac on the loose. So, Harry Potter stories mixed with Percy Jackson, minus the love interests for both characters (they're just friends) and no Voldemort. Cool?"

"Cool? That's frickin AMAZING!" I cheered. Well, anyways, that guy with the bazillion eyes, Argus, met us at the camp gates.

"Hey, Brett. It's been a while. Finally found a way to bring her here without too much of a ruckus?" He asked, while I watched his hundreds of eyes blink. It kind of made me dizzy.

"Yeah, when her mom died and she got kicked out of her home, I figured it was a pretty decent time to get her over here. Can you get her over to the Hermes cabin? I'd like to check in with Aspen. It's been a while."

"Sure, man. I got it from here. Go hang with your girl." Argus thumped him on his back, then turned to me. "So what's your name, kid?"

"I'm Zalinka. You must be Argus. It's wonderful to meet you in person." I realized I sounded like an old businessman meeting the president or something. Oh well. It's not like I could take back what I said. Argus looked mildly surprised. "You've heard of the Percy Jackson books, right?" I asked, "Well, you're in them." Understanding spread across his face before a smile overtook it.

"Well, then, I'll bet you know what we do with new recruits, huh?" He winked at me with half of his eyes. That was creepy as hell - Hades, now, I guess.

I smiled. This was gonna be one awesome day... and the beginning of something amazing. I just knew it. So Argus led me up to the Hermes cabin, and it was just like I'd pictured it. That Rick Riordan author must have been to Camp Half-blood at some point. A tall, wiry dude with brown hair, hazel eyes, and tanned skin strode out of the cabin. The guy was so tall, even I had to look up. "Hey there, girl. What's your name?" He smiled down at me.

"I'm Zalinka. What's yours?" I responded eagerly.

"Agapios. But most people just call me Pio." He stuck his hand out to shake mine, and looked over the top of my head at Argus. "I've got her from here. You're off the hook."

Argus nodded and turned away. Pio lead me into the cabin. "We don't have all that much space, at least until your parent - Mom or Dad by the way? - claims you."

"Cool beans. And it's my dad. Hopefully he'll claim me soon so I can stop being an orphan." He wrapped his arm around me comfortingly. Not in a 'I wanna be your boyfriend' way but in a 'big brother' way. Suddenly, I felt at home. I looked up at him. "This may sound really weird and super awkward, but can you be my surrogate big brother? Even if I get claimed by a god who's not Hermes?"

He chuckled. "Of course. That's really why I'm here. Technically, I'm old enough to be sent out of camp, but they needed someone sorta like a counselor for all the new kids. I'm here for you whenever you need me." He ruffled my hair affectionately. Right then, the lunch bell rang.

"Sweet! I'm starving! Let's go!" I said. He looked at me funny.

"Uh, how did you know that was the lunch bell?"

"Well, first off, it's what, noon? And second, I'm starving. And third, Rick Riordan's Percy Jackson books. And there is how I know that's the lunch bell. But who cares? FOOD!" I practically jumped out the door. He shook his head and chased me to the dining hall. As I hurried across the lawn, I heard Argus and Chiron talking. "I wonder whose daughter she is," Argus said. "With that long reddish gold hair and baby blue eyes, she doesn't really seem to be Aphrodite's, but her figure says Aphrodite all the way!"

"I would agree with you, except for the fact that it's her father, not her mother. Maybe Poseidon?"

I shivered. I should hope not, otherwise I wouldn't have a chance with Percy.

Once everyone had filed in, Chiron stood to make an announcement. "Hello everyone! I'd like to welcome our newest camper, Zalinka!" I raised my hand to wave, when suddenly the hall fell silent. Everyone was staring at me. I realized I must have been claimed, so I looked up to see whose daughter I was.

"Apollo! Sweet!" I said, breaking the silence. I realized that may not have been the most auspicious way to start a conversation. I stood up, "Well I'll be going to the Apollo table then. Ah... Could someone maybe point me in the right direction?"

A tall boy who fit the description of Percy to a T (or would it be a P in this case?) pointed to an empty table towards the end of the hall. "You're right down there, Zalinka."

"Thanks, man." I said, walking down the hall, purposefully swaying my hips. I didn't mind if I got every single guy in camp on my tail with that. But hearing that I had the body of an Aphrodite kid gave me a little confidence in winning over Percy's body... all I had to do was get his head too. When I turned in my seat, I noticed every single girl at the Aphrodite table was glaring at me. And nearly every single guy in the place, with the exception of Chiron and Argus was staring at me with their jaws all the way to Tartarus and their eyes as big as saucers.

Chiron cleared his voice. "Well then. Let's get started with this excellent food. Tuck in!" And then I realized that Chiron must be 'Dumbledore' in the Harry Potter books. But then I noticed the wave of campers getting up to scrape food into the huge fireplace and remembered that you always had to give an offering to your godly parent. So I picked a couple of my favorite things, some sugar cookies, a bit of pork, and some deviled eggs (who made this meal? Deviled eggs for lunch? AWESOME!) and scraped them into the fire, as I silently thanked Apollo for claiming me so quickly.

Lunch was over quickly, so I headed over to find Pio. Finally I found him sitting on the steps of his cabin. "Hey Pio!" I called as I drew near. "Do you know where the Apollo cabin is? And where I can get some money to buy some clothes?" He looked up.

"Sure! Apollo's down at the end there, the one with a bunch of golden-y spikes around the door. And I'll take you down to the shop where the girls buy their clothes." He stood and put a hand on my shoulder, gently guiding me down the rows and through a few training grounds. "Everything's free here, 'cause so much stuff gets damaged during training we'd be broke if we had to buy it back."

"Sweetness. Thanks a ton Pio!" I set off towards the shop. I was going to reinvent my wardrobe. My mom and I had always had a knack for style, and I was gonna go for sexy.

I walked in and surveyed my hunting ground. This would be fun. My ultimate goal: get Percy. I'd need to appeal to his physical side first, and then I could work on getting his mind addicted to me. Right off, I picked out three or four lacy underwear sets (please remember I had nothing with me at all). I found a nice, tight, olive colored tank that showed the top of my cleavage. A bit more searching and I found some nice camo cargo pants and some black combat boots. Training gear collected! I'd leveled up in my personal game. Next goal: PJ's. After searching a bit more, I found a thin, sheer black spaghetti strap nightgown that skimmed the bottom of my ass. Next up, everyday clothes. I found a nice pair of skin tight skinny jeans and a couple pairs of boot-cut jeans with pocket decorations that highlighted my backside. Though I'd love to have a bunch of heels to go with it, I figured it would be better to stick with sensible shoes, so I chose some converse high tops and a pair of Jordans. I found a cute white shirt (how better to highlight my naturally tan skin?) that was tight up the torso and then fanned out in fluttery sleeves. I found a few other low cut shirts, and one that showed just a bit of belly - good thing I wasn't overweight. I found a nice brush, a straightener, and some hair products to go along with the pile of makeup I'd found.

I left the shop with all my new stuff in a plastic bag. Thankfully, my cabin wasn't too far away. I stepped in, and new I was at home. It was perfect! And since there was no one else, I had complete privacy. Excellent. Right off, I stripped out of my dirty clothes and took a shower. An hour or so later, I left the cabin, my hair glossy and straight, my face embellished with a touch of makeup, and looking so damn hot, few guys would be able to resist my draw. A fact proven when I stepped out of my cabin and every male within a hundred yard radius forgot to keep their jaws attached to their head. I flipped my hair over my shoulder and strutted to the Poseidon cabin. Several wolf whistles followed me. I smirked. "Percy?" I called in the door, unwilling to invade his privacy.

"Yeah! Just a sec..." He showed up at the door shirtless - damn that was hot - and his eyes raked my body, exactly what I had wanted. "Um... You're... ah... Zalinka... right?" He seemed to be struggling for words.

"Yeah, hey, I was wondering if you could show me around a bit? I'm kinda new, you know." I batted my eyelashes, hoping his head could supply him with a few words.

"Sure, babe - Zalinka. Sorry. Dunno how that slipped out." He managed to stutter.

"Oh, no worries! _You_ can call me _any_thing you like," I said seductively.

His eyes swept my body appreciatively. "Why don't you come in for a bit then, babe. I can show you around my place." His tone hinted that he might be showing me a little more than just his 'place' - which I was perfectly fine with.

"Only if I won't be in the way..." I said innocently. He shook his head, though his eyes remained firmly fastened on my chest. "Well, aright." I brushed passed him, being careful to let my hand brush over his crotch. I felt him stiffen slightly before following me into the cabin. I looked back to see a dazed smile on his face and his eyes focused on my ass. "So, what's life like here in camp?" I asked.

"Oh, uh, it's pretty fun. I mean, we can train all we want, and do anything we like, even only doing what we're good at." He managed to refocus on my face for a bit... before getting distracted with my hair. He reached out to touch it, but realized what he was doing when his hand was halfway there. "Ah, sorry. I seem to be having trouble making my head keep my body in line. Sorry."

I smiled. "No worries, I don't mind in the least. You can touch my hair whenever." Almost immediately, his hand flew to my hair. He stroked it, then tangled his hand in the reddish good strands, entranced with its motion.

"Er... come on in. Don't know why we're standing out here on the doorstep." He said dazedly.


End file.
